Family

So my husband had a seizure this morning and this is a list of my thoughts when he was flailing like a fish out of water:

What the fuck?

Ambulance!

Mum…no…Kids!

Shit! The kids! 

****calling ambulance**** mum need mum… no no no 

How am I gonna do this alone? Whats the number for ambulance? Dammit just type! “NSW AMBULANCE PLEASE!” 

it’s okay the paramedics should know what to do.

—–

My husband woke up 3 hours later and told me off for calling the ambulance. I came back to the hospital an hour after that to find him unconscious on his bed and the doctor says “well it’s good you called the ambulance cuz he just had another seizure 10 minutes ago. I’ve knocked him out”

When I heard the doctor tell me that, I just wanted a hug from anybody. I would have taken anything just to feel safe. But I don’t have anyone. I kept looking through my phone to see if I can call someone but my best friend moved overseas, her mum has a father who is sick anyway and my in laws are overseas.

I have no family. So I called work and told them I won’t be coming. I called the baby sitter and said she might have to look after the kids a little longer. I called my husbands work and lied that he fell out of bed and I am sitting here now….completely alone hoping he doesn’t have another seizure and wondering if it is safe for the kids to be around him right now.

Its just the 2 of us though.

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